Sunday, August 23, 2009

If You Give Paul a Pie

(A lyrical account in the style of Laura Numeroff of our recent Chamberlain girl Estrogen Summit at our dear sister Linda’s home in Victoria, B.C. )

If you give Paul a Pie
He might just lick the plate
And if he licks the plate, then Linda will do, too.
After so much plate licking, you might need a walk to the beach.

To admire the wildflowers

And find strange sea creatures

And watch the sunset from the breakwater.

And if you watch the sunset from the breakwater, you might feel a little melancholy. And if you feel melancholy, you might just need a little bridge mix.


And if you’re eating bridge mix, you might just need a good book.

So you peruse the bookshelves to find this:
But settle on “The Power of One” by Linda’s recommendation.
And after eating bridge mix and reading you need to get the blood going, so you take a bike ride.
And if you go on a bike ride, your chain might come off.

If your chain falls off, you’ll have to ride down to a beautiful beach

And get in the water



Or not.

And if you go on a bike ride and get wet, you’ll have to ride through the forest on the way home. And if you ride through the forest you’ll have to pick wild blackberries.

And if you pick blackberries, you’ll have to make Lemon Blackberry Pavlova.


And if you eat pavlova, you might just need to lay on the couch and look out the window.




And if you lay on the couch and look out the window, you might just see a stormy sunset brewing.

And if you see a stormy sunset brewing, you may need to run down to the beach through the rain, defying all reason and almost getting killed by a taxi.

And if you make it to the beach alive, you’ll get to see the cruise ships casting off.


And that will remind you to return home and try and finish your book.

And if you finish your book you’ll need to walk downtown to the Munro’s Bookstore. You’ll pass by The Empress.

And Chinatown. If you’re in Chinatown, you need to have some Dim Sum.


After Dim Sum you'll need coconut buns.


And eat one right away.
After all that eating, you’ll need to do some kayaking.
Where you terrorize the wildlife,Take pictures of your feet,

Dodge the landing seaplanes,

And paddle around the Inner Harbour.
After all of that work, you might just need a snack, so you make some mixed berry crumble.

And eat while admiring Paul’s artwork around the house.

And take in the flowers


While thus relaxing, you remind yourself that you haven’t yet been to Pagliacci’s, the best Italian joint around. So you go.

And eat the best Caesar salad you've ever had, plus multiple bowls of lentil or minestrone soup
And if you eat a lot of soup...

You deserve a little turtle pie.

Ordered from the suggestive menu.

And if you eat turtle pie for lunch, you’re going to have to eat sushi for dinner. (You know, yin and yang.)

So you try sashimi
And the “special”

And lots of sushi




And if you eat a ton of sushi, you're going to have to redeem yourself. The best way to redeem yourself is to make a really nice, fresh dinner (the next day, of course.)

You make panzanella
And feast on stuffed grape leaves, hummus and antipasti



And if you've stuffed yourself beyond belief, laughed until you peed your pants, cried profusely, exercised until your legs burned, and played speed Scrabble until it was very, very late, it might just be time to go home.

And if it's almost time to go home, you might just need to make one more pie.


8 comments:

mindy said...

Wow! I just have to say that ALL sounds amazing. You are one lucky girl.

Fab Fisher Family said...

Your trip looked amazing and the food, yum. I'm seriously hungry now.

Linda said...

Did we really eat that much? It is always about the food I tell you... It was fantastic having you, Laura, and Mom here. It was really nice having good chats, good eats, and a bit of excerise of course too (even if it was yoga). I hope everyone knows that we didn't try the drinks on Pags menu of course, just a little laughing at the ridiculous names. Hannahs favavorite pasta dish is"The dish with no name" and my fav is "The Secret Garden" and "the noodle of living dangerously"
go figure...

amanda said...

yay for feet pictures. and that made me really really want to go to victoria.

Adventurous Housewife said...

I wonder what would happen if I gave Russ a pie?

Laura Chamberlain said...

That was me by the way who almost got killed by the taxi while chasing after the sunset.
Can we go back?
I'll take the pics and you can write the stories. You can also continue to make the food and sure enough, I'll eat it!

Hannah said...

Oh man good memories! I've never eaten so many pies/ desserts in my life.

Alison said...

I loved it!